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Speed Dating and Sacrifice


It was quite a mixed night for one Matthew T. Kubisch - and in mixed ways. Fresh off from winning several competitions at a Wyoming Catholic College speed dating event - in a turkey costume no less, he returned last Friday night to his apartment to terror for himself - in the inspiration of the muses upon the Sophomore class.

He was forcibly removed from his apartment and offered as a sacrificial offering to the goddesses of their sister dorm, who promptly had mercy upon him and released him from his bondage.


An adventure, no, just part of our vibrant cult life here at Irkutsk Ice Truckers where affiliated organizations run the cult of John Wayne, the cult of dorm raids, the Evangelium Andreii, and the like.


At the same time as Matthew's escapades, Bernadette (one of them) tried to elope with Michael the Rosie before nearly a hundred assembled students. It didn't go well and we feel sorry for them, but please don't take this as a sign that speed dating doesn't work.
While an "interesting" evening, these professionals share their opinions:

"Speed dating really worked for me!" ~ Jonathan Rensch
"Speed dating really helped me discover my one true love... rocks." ~ Stan Grove“
No comment.” ~ Peter Fay
“Soooooo much better than Catholic Match.” ~ Susan Gleason"
What speed dating taught me is that I'm really bad at flirting..." ~ Anonymous
"The beauty of speed dating is that it makes you forget, for a brief moment, the crushing, deadening, inevitable, depressing, stressful, weight of being alone." ~ Paul Merimee
"Speed dating is really the best place to find true love." ~ Anna Snell
Come next year and see what happens!
Matthew and Isabel

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