Skip to main content

Speed Dating and Sacrifice

Image
By

It was quite a mixed night for one Matthew T. Kubisch - and in mixed ways. Fresh off from winning several competitions at a Wyoming Catholic College speed dating event - in a turkey costume no less, he returned last Friday night to his apartment to terror for himself - in the inspiration of the muses upon the Sophomore class.

He was forcibly removed from his apartment and offered as a sacrificial offering to the goddesses of their sister dorm, who promptly had mercy upon him and released him from his bondage.


An adventure, no, just part of our vibrant cult life here at Irkutsk Ice Truckers where affiliated organizations run the cult of John Wayne, the cult of dorm raids, the Evangelium Andreii, and the like.


At the same time as Matthew's escapades, Bernadette (one of them) tried to elope with Michael the Rosie before nearly a hundred assembled students. It didn't go well and we feel sorry for them, but please don't take this as a sign that speed dating doesn't work.
While an "interesting" evening, these professionals share their opinions:

"Speed dating really worked for me!" ~ Jonathan Rensch
"Speed dating really helped me discover my one true love... rocks." ~ Stan Grove“
No comment.” ~ Peter Fay
“Soooooo much better than Catholic Match.” ~ Susan Gleason"
What speed dating taught me is that I'm really bad at flirting..." ~ Anonymous
"The beauty of speed dating is that it makes you forget, for a brief moment, the crushing, deadening, inevitable, depressing, stressful, weight of being alone." ~ Paul Merimee
"Speed dating is really the best place to find true love." ~ Anna Snell
Come next year and see what happens!
Matthew and Isabel

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular

New Serious WCC Freshman Endeavor

By
Freshmen Anne and Emily, aiming to redeem opinions of the Class of 2022 from being solely satirical and unserious, have launched a serious project, a blog named the Barnabus Project About it: The Barnabas Project is a blog by and for the Wyoming Catholic College class of 2022. It’s a kind of combined lit-mag and indie coffee shop; it’s a site for philosophical musings on what we’re reading and thinking about, photography from our vacations, poetry and short stories, or basically anything. A little background: at the end of COR, we had a program at campfire called The Barnabas Project in which we, in a way, prepared to face the challenges of being a student. As we face the challenges of summer, this blog will be a small oasis of WCC culture against the tumultuous ocean of the wider world. Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton   View it here: https://wyclassof2022.home.blog/ To contribute (if you're a Freshmore ), find Anne's email ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Ban the Joe: Get Joe to Come Here

By
The symbol of the cause Many WCC students are mourning the loss of Joe B. to University of Dallas. A promising member of the spring Founders draft, many were looking forward to him joining the Class of 2023. Banjo Guy as he is called, has reportedly committed to attending the University of Dallas near his Texas hometown, in a decision largely predicated upon the attendance there of many of his friends. But never fear, it's not too late! "It's not up to him whether he comes or not," was the simple conclusion from a high-level meeting of the new WCC Future Student Decision Council. Simply, that means that as everyone wants him here, he can't just decide to go elsewhere. Everyone wants him to come here, but how, one might ask, do we change this horrible decision? There are multiple ways to be sure, but to begin, we're collecting signatures as part of a national BAN-JO campaign. Ban does not mean ban in the typical sense of disallowing, but is h...
Post a Comment
Read more

FaceTruck by IIT

By
Announcing our new social media heavy metal replacement for your Google+, Facebook, etc. etc. accounts. FaceTruck by IIT - Keep up with your metalhead friends, prospects, propositions and news. Register today for a new experience at  Facetruck.net The reviews are extraordinary - rated 4.9 out of 5 stars on the Irkutsk App Store Joseph Nemec - "Totally cool, fam, way better than my 15 year-old Google Plus account." Try it today!
Post a Comment
Read more